Why sensible kids don’t get pregnant at 16

About a week ago I got a call from a friend, living a 20 minute stroll away, asking if I wanted a babysitting job while she’s on holiday next week. I figure, babysitting, I’ve done that before. Going to someone’s house, read the kids a story, put the kids to bed (unless you’re lucky and they’re already asleep), watching a couple of hours TV that I’d probably be watching anyway at home and getting paid for it. Not at all strenuous, call me lazy but that’s the type of work I like.

I accept and the friend tells me she’s going to pass along my number to the woman I’ll be babysitting for. Two days later I get a text from the woman in question asking if I’ll go round their house briefly one evening to meet the kids, fix dates and whatnot. At this point I see nothing alarming, parents like to check in with these people – make sure they’re not leaving their kids in the care on a serial killer or anything. Standard procedure, I’ve done this before.

So I go to the house at the specified time on the decided day and I’m greeted at the door by a man who says his wife’s not home but he’ll answer any questions I have. At this I’m a little confused, normally it would be the other way round- him asking me questions. However, I didn’t voice this opinion and politely stated that I have no inquiries. The man looked relieved and says, he thought I wouldn’t as I already know the kids so well and everything. I’m thinking, ‘Excuse me!?’ I’ve never met any of your family before now. He looks shocked when I say this and asks if I know anything about the job I was going to do. I answer this with, “babysitting?” as if I was being asked a difficult question in school but I wasn’t really sure of my answer. I follow with this by saying “I was going to fix dates with your wife tonight.” I figured there could only be a couple of nights at most, my friend was only going away for two weeks. The man’s not sure about dates except he thinks that it will be 4 days next week (I’m thinking, “Jeesh, these people like to party!”), but he corrects my first answer from “babysitting” to “babysitting/nannying”. Now I don’t know what a “/nannying” actually includes but the rapidly talking man in front of me says this:

Getting up at 6.30AM so that I can get to their house at 7.15AM, waking the girls up, getting them both dressed, making and feeding them breakfast, brushing their teeth, walking them to school, walking them home from school, entertaining them for 3 hours, making and feeding them dinner until their mum gets home around 7.30PM. On top of that the 7 year-old is apparently ‘over-emotional’ and frequently gets sad and/or has tantrums and the 5 year-old is a severe coeliac so that if she consumes any gluten there is a chance of her dying. I don’t know about you but that seems quite a lot for a “/nannying” to include. I’m overwhelmed as I leave the house with promises of the wife/mother calling me that night to finalize dates.

Once I got home, I started to panic, the only experience I’ve had with kids under 10 is putting them to bed, and at most reading them a story, hardly dressing, feeding and teeth brushing. This woman basically wanted me to be the kids mum when she couldn’t be. Don’t you think there’s a reason why sensible kids don’t get pregnant at 16? Responsibility. I’m not confident providing for these kids who I don’t know, even for a fee, while I’m highly capable of doing something stupid while I’m busy being a selfish 16 year-old and thinking of myself. Whether it be letting them wander into the road en-route to school or forgetting to wash my hands after I (God-forbid) consume gluten. I may be overreacting, lord knows how my friend managed, but I’m nowhere near ready to look after anyone except myself at this age.

When I try to explain that to the woman on the phone later that night all she replies is, “Did my stupid husband freak you out?” Although inside I’m screaming “YES”, I refrain to say this and explain myself a way that roughly equates to, “It’s not you, It’s me”. She’s obviously heard this one before because this she understands. She utters a sarcastic “I appreciate it. Bye” and the phone goes dead. Woops.


One Life Ambition Down, Plenty More To Go!

Okay, so I have a lot of ridiculous life ambitions, but today I actually completed one of them.

The Rubix Cube, the world’s favourite puzzle toy notoriously hard to solve. I’ve had one sitting around for years, scrambled beyond anyone’s help, but I’ve always wanted to crack it. I looked it up on Youtube and obviously their were a thousand of different videos trying to teach you how but, after sifting through a few, I found Robh0629’s 7 step method by far the easiest to grasp.

My finished cube

Also for those who like to cheat: http://www.wrongway.org/cube/solve.html


A love-affair with a superbrand

My family of 5 own 11 apple products, which isn’t too many, but enough to show to a genuine devotion to the brand. I’m not sure what it is, but there is a certain something about a handful of brands that awards them with a string of followers, thus making them a superbrand, Apple included. I would consider myself as one of these followers, not particularly hardcore, but I’ve always loved the products apple makes and everything about the company. Until recently…

For my birthday in March I desperately needed a new phone and, of course, I had my mind set on the latest apple model. I knew it cost a ridiculous amount, which I would heavily have to subsidise to cover the expense. But hey, It would be worth it right!? The next two months were bliss, I could not imagine how I ever survived without this phone, my whole life was on that device. However, me being so clumsy, the inevitable happened. It was on my lap one minute, and the next it was lying face down on the concrete. I was so angry at myself for being stupid enough to let it happen but, not wanting to accept blame, I was quickly shifting some of that anger towards Apple.

(Why were those damn screens made of glass that was so easy to break!?)

Having no insurance and Apple’s warranty not covering accidental damage, I was forced to go into the shop on a trip to London to see how I could get it repaired. Filled with resentment for the brand as I walked into the shop I noticed bad things I’d never seen before about the firm. Why were their shops always horribly crowded? Why were their staff always annoyingly cheerful? and Why didn’t their stupid warranty cover accidental damage? (Although in the back of my mind I knew that it was my fault really.) I began to see Apple as a big, greedy, money-hungry corporation rather than the cosy, cool, down-to-earth brand I had envisioned before.

We were told by the woman referring us to a specific techie that the phone would cost £139 to replace and we’d have to wait 20 minutes because they were running late. I was furious. On top of all the money I’d already paid for the stupid phone I was having to pay another outrageous amount. I was so infuriated with myself but I channelled this into researching iPhone 4 screens cracking on the near iPad. I felt better (and increasingly smug) when I discovered all the bad press Apple had been getting for making the screens too easily smashed. Anyhow, all these feelings quickly disappeared when we met our techie Steve who introduced himself as our glamorous assistant, fairy godmother would actually be more appropriate for what he did for us! After a quick conversation consisting of flashy smiles and sympathetic coos when displaying the damage, he said as long as I promised to take care of my new phone, he’d give me it free of charge! I was so shocked and in awe frankly, my faith was restored. THIS is exactly why I loved the brand. The back of my mind was telling me that this was a publicity stunt. That they’d purposefully made the screens easily broken so that they’d replace the phones for free and make their customers love them even more. To be honest, I couldn’t care less, after a brief tiff me and apple had seen eye to eye and my unrequited love was restored.

Starbucks drink your heart out!

Ever had one of those fruit frappuccino blends from Starbucks?

They are absolutely delicious (in my humble opinion)! I went through a phase of buying them, every time I passed a Starbucks and had a little time to spare, and I spent so much money! Little did I know I could make my own, which I think tastes better, and without even leaving my house and I’m going to pass on my superior recipe to you!

You need: A handful of frozen raspberries, a handful of frozen mango, a few lugs of apple juice and a smoothie maker/blender.


To make the frappuccino chuck the frozen fruit into the blender and add enough apple juice so that the fruit is fully submerged. Turn the blender on and let the machine do it’s work! Turn off when all the mixture is fully blended and there are no lumps of frozen fruit left in the mix.


Big List of Things to Do this Summer.

  1. Make a big list – 12/07/11
  2. Finish all my exams – 27/06/11
  3. Go to my first prom – 30/06/11
  4. Go to Wimbledon and see some brilliant tennis -29/06/11 https://pseudopseudonymous.wordpress.com/2011/07/03/the-wonders-of-wimbledon/
  5. Go to at least one concert – 03/07/11
  6. Make a penny mirror – 07/07/11
  7. Start a blog – 18/06/11
  8. Write a song
  9. Take some amazing photos
  10. Get a tan
  11. Discover some new music
  12. Tone my bum!
  13. Learn to make a new recipe
  14. Tie Dye!
  15. Meet some new people
  16. Complete a Rubik cube – 26/07/11 https://pseudopseudonymous.wordpress.com/2011/07/26/one-life-ambition-down-plenty-more-to-go/
  17. Have a proper picnic
  18. Go vintage shopping – 27/07/11
  19. See some London sights
  20. Write a poem(s) – 10/07/11
  21. Find a new hobby
  22. Complete a 5k run without dying
  23. Revamp some old clothing
  24. Sew something from scratch
  25. Finish furnishing my bedroom
  26. Découpage something
  27. Enter a competition and win
  28. Get good exam results (optional!)
  29. Go to a festival
  30. Read 5 books from my reading list for next year
  31. Have a Harry Potter movie marathon
  32. Learn to play tennis and win a match
  33. See someone famous
  34. Write a short story
  35. Draw/Paint something/someone
  36. Redecorate a room
  37. Learn (or attempt to learn) to juggle
  38. Watch a whole season of a rubbish TV show
  39. Go to the beach
  40. Watch the top 10 films of all time (by IMDb)
  41. Go to the theatre
  42. Have some sort of driving lesson/experience
  43. Have a complete room sort out
  44. Visit a museum/gallery
  45. Make a playlist entitled “The soundtrack of my life”
  46. Draw a self-portrait
  47. Learn all 50 states of America (although I do not live there)
  48. Buy some new headphones
  49. Document my time fulfilling this list
  50. Complete all 50 items on “Big list of things to do this summer”
Okay, so I’ve already completed quite a few of these! But that by no means I’m going to get anywhere near to doing everything. I’m going to try to blog as much as possible when completing this list and I’ll update it when I’ve done something.

The Wonders of Wimbledon

Earlier this week I was lucky enough to witness the men’s quarter finals of the most famous tennis grand slam, Wimbledon. After a long night of queuing, and very little sleep, I got my wristband for court 1 and watched: Nadal V. Fish and Djokovic V. Tomic. The matches were brilliant and, due to my brilliant seats, I managed to take some decent photos.

No. 1

Sizing up the competition

Serving to an anxious stadium

Hardcore Fans

Gentlemen’s Handshake

Signature Move

Rafa’s Killer Serve


A Much Needed Refreshment

Fish Bouncing Back




The Art of Procrastination

Procrastination meaning to defer/delay an action. Or in other words, what you’re doing right now.

I would consider myself a master at this particular art form, I have lots of experience. In fact, for the past 2 months I would have spent around 23 hours a day procrastinating as I have been on “study” leave while I revise for exams. I put study in quotation marks because although that is the ultimate aim, that doesn’t really happen. So to pass on my knowledge I have made my-

Top 5 ways to procrastinate:

1) Planning- I find myself planning to study more often than not, using the simple excuse, “That’s counts as revision right?” When really all I’ve achieved is meticulously planning out a rigorous revision schedule with timed tea breaks that I’m never going to follow. I even plan in extra planning time.

2) Procrastibaking- This word should be added to the dictionary as it is so commonly executed. It involves making any number of delicious things to consume at a later date. (Or help out with point 3!) I find myself spending hours crafting intricate sponge cakes and decorating them carefully or the cutest cupcakes with so much gaudy icing you’d get a headache just looking at them. Nevertheless I would consider this one of the most enjoyable forms of procrastination. Featured is the aftermath of one of my successful procrastibaking sessions.

3) Comfort Eating- It’s a must. The guilty feeling that comes as a consequence of procrastination can cleverly be masked by eating all the yummiest things you can find. Stress eating is never a good move but it’s so necessary! Eating Ben & Jerry’s and all my procrastibakes just makes me feel better. (Plus it means I can put off revising for longer!)

4) Cleaning Things- If my mum saw this one, she’d laugh her head off. I am one of the messiest people you’ll find! But desperate times call for desperate measures. I find an ingenious method of wasting time that should be spent doing useful things is disassembling my floordrobe, spending hours doing the dishes and having a big sort out of everything I own.

And last but definitely not least…

5) BloggingI’m fairly new to this custom but I can tell it’ll definitely be a whopping big slice of the pie chart showing time I spend putting crucial tasks off. But it’s fun right? And do I really need to be doing all these things? Probably, yes. But oh well, I’ll just eat a great big piece of procrastibaking chocolate cake and be done with it.